BRIAN SAX HATES LIBRARIES
Especially
YOUR
library
(Scroll to learn more)
Who's Brian Sax?
Brian Sax is a an embittered little Saxophone that hates reading
and especially hates the library. Pretty weird for the
superintendent of Cable County Schools in East Virginia, right?
We thought so too! So, with that in mind, we just wanted to give you a little background information about Brian the Saxophone and his unique approach to education.
Why does he hate the library?
Brian Sax's disdain for the library is as confusing as it is bold. As a musical instrument brought to life, Brian has never found comfort in the quiet, book-lined halls of the library. He believes that the resources allocated to libraries would be better spent on other vaguely educational initiatives, like unsustainable technology spending.Some speculate that his aversion to libraries stems from a deep-seated jealousy of the attention books receive, while others suggest it's simply a result of his single-minded focus on his own agenda. Others still claim to have heard the instrument offhandedly mention that "If it doesn't honk, it's not worth a plonk" . Whatever the reason, Brian's contempt for libraries has become a defining feature of his tenure as superintendent, shaping his policies and actions in ways that continue to baffle the residents of Cable County.
What's this all about?
Brian Sax wants to be seen and known as an administrator that "gets things done." This means that when times get tough, Brian MUST be seen doing....something. What's that something? Who knows! As long as he's a real "go-getter", 'ole Brassy Brian knows it will all turn out all right. The humble pencil and paper that has guided education in his county for over a century? Surely an improvement could be made with expensive equipment! Longitudinal studies for the efficacy of this equipment? What are those?! Give new curriculums time so that efficacy can be tested? Why would he do that when new curriculums are published every year that can be bought? Surely educators are just like pieces of code that can be patched with the latest update, right? Hell, as long as Brian can brag that he did something before those 'lazy rich guys' in Buttnam County he can call it innovating and everyone will cheer his name! This means that Brian's eagerness to be perceived as a proactive leader has led to a series of choices that prioritize immediate visibility over genuine improvement.Now, when a a real mover and shaker needs to fund his latest pet project, but temporary money is drying up, what is he to do? He could petition community members for an excess levy to replace that lost funding. That makes sense.... But what if there were also two largely popular community resources that he just can't stand? That's right, the Cable County Public Library system and Greater Huntingtown Parks and Recreation District. Why not kill two birds with one stone? Propose a levy that not only funds his pet projects but also completely defunds those pesky libraries and parks. After all, who needs books and green spaces when you've got shiny new tech gadgets and the promise of progress, right?
Of course, none of this would be possible without the unwavering support of his family of reeds. They're always there to rubber-stamp his decisions, no matter how shortsighted or detrimental they may be to the community. It's a perfect setup for Brian: he gets to be the hero in his own story, while the needs and desires of Cable County's residents take a backseat.
Wait... He has a family?
Of course he does! No Saxophone worth his salt is going to ruffle all these feathers alone. Like any other saxophone, Brian is going to need a family of reeds to keep him implementing ideas that properly HONK! Since they wear out in staggered terms, they are all too willing to rubber-stamp his decisions while purposely ignoring the needs of the community that surrounds them too. They, like Brian, are not free of guilt and are driven by their strong desire to be seen doing something...anything so that they can justify their positions in the Sax family.
Ronharmony Reed
Scary Reed
Ali Sax-Reed
Coytempo Reed
Joshtaccato Reed
Coytempo Reed
Joshtaccato Reed
What can I do?
Easy! You can ask your local librarian or parks representative if you have a someone like 'ole Honkers making changes without thinking about them. If you do, you should participate in your local board meetings and make sure the institutions that are dear to you are supported. The best communities are those that are informed and willing to participate in the civil system that surrounds them. If you would like a real-world example of an administration making similar decisions, check out information about our current district of interest:
Find out what else Brian Sax hates: